I've been reading this book, Captivating by Stasi and John Elderedge, and it is awesome. i got a good ways through it and it was the chapter about all the wounds we have and the messages we received that caused them. I decided to make a list of all the messages i received, that hold me back from doing whatever God has called me to do, that shouldn't be allowed to anymore.
anyone who actually reads this, I challenge you to do the same, you might be suprised at what you come up with.
i hope you do not take this the wrong way, this is not an attention thing, this is my heart in a journal.

you are not pretty
you are not interesting enough to keep attention
you are simple minded
you are creative, which means no one understands you
your learning style is what the school system is least built for
you will never make it in college
you need to be fixed to think like normal people
you are not sporty= you are not cool
you are fat and that will never change bc youre so small
youre too much emotionally
you are not anough spiritually
youll never get anywhere, you're stuck in this place of nonpassion
your own brother won't listen to you bc you're a failure. you don't have it figured out, so why should he trust you?
youre not a good Christian woman, and you will never understand how its done
you will never be able to work things out with your stepmom, or to be good friends with her.
you will never be able to pay off your loans
you will never be strong enough to blaze a new path first
you will never find love
you will never find an accountablity partner so why even try
you will never be able to give anyone the help they really need
your parents will never be proud of you
you will never be someone to look up to

Feel free to cry, i know i do every time i read through the whole thing. these are Satans messages to our hearts bc he knows what we can become bc God made us, and he fears us bc of it. we can't let him bring us down. "We were meant to live for so much more"!

I am going to write another one full of truths and when i do, i will put it up also, and challenge you to do that also. this is just something that has been laid on my heart, another step toward becoming whoever God wants me to be. and i hope that sharing my heart can help at least one other person.
It also took a load off to write it in the first place, and then now its down on paper and i can look back and hopefully i can start leaving the messages behind.